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13 Amazing Gadgets to Help You Win Thanksgiving

Category: Beer Humor
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Thanksgiving is a time of warmth, of family, of home and hearth, and intrafamily competition. Remember 1996, when Cousin Mel put you to shame with his amazing mashed potatoes? Or 2007, when Grandma Peppy returned that punt 94 yards to win the backyard Turkey Bowl? She hasn’t shut up about it since. Well, this year is your time to shine. You’ll be giving thanks for this awesome semi-Thanksgiving-related stuff. Everyone else will be giving thanks for you, because you totally pwnd Thanksgiving 2016.

01

Scanomat TopBrewer

Thanksgiving demands stamina, especially when the tryptophan kicks in. Forget making pot after pot after pot of coffee; the Scanomat TopBrewer ($11,000) puts lattes and espressos on tap. Select a drink in the app, stick a mug under the stainless-steel faucet, and youre chuggin joe 15 seconds later. The built-in foamer can also be used to steam some broccoli in a pinch.

Credit: scanomat

Thanksgiving demands stamina, especially when the tryptophan kicks in. Forget making pot after pot after pot of coffee; the Scanomat TopBrewer ($11,000) puts lattes and espressos on tap. Select a drink in the app, stick a mug under the stainless-steel faucet, and youre chuggin joe 15 seconds later. The built-in foamer can also be used to steam some broccoli in a pinch.

02

TCL Xess

Alexas a great helper in the kitchen, but the Amazon Echo on your counterdoesnt have a screen. Its hard to followthat recipe for pecan pieover the din of political arguments in your living room. This TCL mini-TV ($500) is madefor the kitchen, and it has Alexa voice commands built into it for the best of both worlds: Spoken-word answers, big-screen videos, and text instructions for your recipes.

Credit: TCL

Alexas a great helper in the kitchen, but the Amazon Echo on your counterdoesnt have a screen. Its hard to followthat recipe for pecan pieover the din of political arguments in your living room. This TCL mini-TV ($500) is madefor the kitchen, and it has Alexa voice commands built into it for the best of both worlds: Spoken-word answers, big-screen videos, and text instructions for your recipes.

03

Scott eVest OTG Jacket

The only problem with visiting someone elses house for Thanksgivingis thatyouwon’thave a fridge full of leftovers at your place. Thats a bummer. Well, meet the wardrobe MVP of turkey day: The OTG Jacket ($215) has 29 pockets hidden inside of it, including two big enough for small laptops or bigtablets. You know what that means: Plenty of room for massive to-go tubsof bird and fixins.

Credit: scottevest

The only problem with visiting someone elses house for Thanksgivingis thatyouwon’thave a fridge full of leftovers at your place. Thats a bummer. Well, meet the wardrobe MVP of turkey day: The OTG Jacket ($215) has 29 pockets hidden inside of it, including two big enough for small laptops or bigtablets. You know what that means: Plenty of room for massive to-go tubsof bird and fixins.

04

Le Creuset Signature Roaster

Everyyear, you buy one of those flimsy aluminum roasting pans, and then it springs a leak, and then valuable turkey juices spill everywhere. Step it up this year—and well into the future—with this enamel-coated Le Creuset cast-iron roaster($200 and up).Itcomesin three sizes and seven colors, so itll match all the other Le Creuset jawns in your pantry. Its also the perfect size for a giant vat of seven-layer dip come Super Bowl time.

Credit: Le Creuset

Everyyear, you buy one of those flimsy aluminum roasting pans, and then it springs a leak, and then valuable turkey juices spill everywhere. Step it up this year—and well into the future—with this enamel-coated Le Creuset cast-iron roaster($200 and up).Itcomesin three sizes and seven colors, so itll match all the other Le Creuset jawns in your pantry. Its also the perfect size for a giant vat of seven-layer dip come Super Bowl time.

05

Power Mitt 2.0 Oven Mitt

Oven mitts keep your hands safe, but more importantly, they provide a chance for some turkey-day sassafrass. The Nintendo NES Classic is really hard to find, but you can still herald your undying love for all things 8-bit with these Power Glove-themed hand-protectors($15).In fact, theyre probably more useful than the actualNintendo Power Glove.

Credit: fangamer

Oven mitts keep your hands safe, but more importantly, they provide a chance for some turkey-day sassafrass. The Nintendo NES Classic is really hard to find, but you can still herald your undying love for all things 8-bit with these Power Glove-themed hand-protectors($15).In fact, theyre probably more useful than the actualNintendo Power Glove.

06

ChefsChoice 610 Electric Food Slicer

Carving turkey by hand means non-uniform slices and a mean case of carvin thumb. It also takes a while. Make quick work of that bird with this $130deli-stylemeat slicer, which can serve up thick slabs at dinnertime and paper-thin cuts for those secret midnight sandwiches. It’ll also make leftovers last a bit longer, as youll be grubbin on slimmer slices of turducken.

Credit: edgecraft

Carving turkey by hand means non-uniform slices and a mean case of carvin thumb. It also takes a while. Make quick work of that bird with this $130deli-stylemeat slicer, which can serve up thick slabs at dinnertime and paper-thin cuts for those secret midnight sandwiches. It’ll also make leftovers last a bit longer, as youll be grubbin on slimmer slices of turducken.

07

Salton Electric Gravy Boat

Gravy is the best. But heres the problem with gravy: You usually heat it up last, which means your guests are sitting around waiting for that sweet sweet turkey sauce. If not, youre left with cold gravy, which is better than no gravy but not as good as warm gravy. This electric gravy boat lets you get the gravy on the table early, and it still keeps it toasty. It’s also named after 1960s psychedelic-rock band Electric Gravy Boat. $20.

Credit: Bed bath and beyond

Gravy is the best. But heres the problem with gravy: You usually heat it up last, which means your guests are sitting around waiting for that sweet sweet turkey sauce. If not, youre left with cold gravy, which is better than no gravy but not as good as warm gravy. This electric gravy boat lets you get the gravy on the table early, and it still keeps it toasty. It’s also named after 1960s psychedelic-rock band Electric Gravy Boat. $20.

08

mBerry Miracle Fruit Tablets

Look, everyones taste buds are different, and yours may not jibe well with those of your gracious hosts. You like turkey, and you like full-sour pickles, but Aunt Doriss pickle-stuffed turkey is another story altogether. If youre heading into enemy territory in terms of flavor sensations, bring somemiracle berry tablets along. They make sour things taste sweet, and you can happily flavor-trip your way through that lime-and-alum casserole. $15.

Credit: Mberry

Look, everyones taste buds are different, and yours may not jibe well with those of your gracious hosts. You like turkey, and you like full-sour pickles, but Aunt Doriss pickle-stuffed turkey is another story altogether. If youre heading into enemy territory in terms of flavor sensations, bring somemiracle berry tablets along. They make sour things taste sweet, and you can happily flavor-trip your way through that lime-and-alum casserole. $15.

09

The Ugly NFL Sweater of Your Choice

Tis the season to don deliberately garish accoutrements, and its become such a national phenomenon that the NFL sells intentionally ugly sweaters for every team. Even if your squad of choice isnt playing on Thanksgiving, you can still represent in the most hideous fashion imaginable. Some of them even have built-in LED lights for an extra serving of terrible.$60 to $70.

Credit: nflshop

Tis the season to don deliberately garish accoutrements, and its become such a national phenomenon that the NFL sells intentionally ugly sweaters for every team. Even if your squad of choice isnt playing on Thanksgiving, you can still represent in the most hideous fashion imaginable. Some of them even have built-in LED lights for an extra serving of terrible.$60 to $70.

10

Tudor Games Electric Football

Before you hitthe backyard for the annual family football game, come up withan unbeatable gameplan. Everyones in the kitchen listening to Grandpa Chet drone on about property taxes, so sneak off with Cousin Bernice and Uncle Rufus to draw up offensive schemes with this $100throwback vibrating football game. You could also play a quick game, but no ones really figured how to play electric football in its 69 years of existence.

Credit: Tudor Games

Before you hitthe backyard for the annual family football game, come up withan unbeatable gameplan. Everyones in the kitchen listening to Grandpa Chet drone on about property taxes, so sneak off with Cousin Bernice and Uncle Rufus to draw up offensive schemes with this $100throwback vibrating football game. You could also play a quick game, but no ones really figured how to play electric football in its 69 years of existence.

11

Wilson Connected X Smart Football

Youre probably the best quarterback in the history of Thanksgiving backyard football, but theres been no way to quantify your excellence until now. Wilsons sensor-packed pigskin ($200) syncs up to your iPhone to deliver instant throw-speed and yardage stats, plus itll tell you how Speedo-tight your spiral is. In game mode, itll even offer play-by-play for your personal two-minute drills. The only thing it doesn’t do isbook your post-victory trip to Disneyland.

Credit: Wilson

Youre probably the best quarterback in the history of Thanksgiving backyard football, but theres been no way to quantify your excellence until now. Wilsons sensor-packed pigskin ($200) syncs up to your iPhone to deliver instant throw-speed and yardage stats, plus itll tell you how Speedo-tight your spiral is. In game mode, itll even offer play-by-play for your personal two-minute drills. The only thing it doesn’t do isbook your post-victory trip to Disneyland.

12

Fizzics Waytap

To the victors go the spoils and the celebratory beers—preferably draught beers. Getting a keg for turkey day is a serious investment, but the Fizzics Waytap ($130) makes bottlesandcans full of the good stuff taste like its on tap. You put anything from a 12-ounce bottleto a tallboyin the machine, pull the handle, and let the Waytaps sonic waves work their foam-creating magic. An older version of the machine works with growlers, but it doesn’t look as pretty as the redesigned system.

Credit: Fizzics

To the victors go the spoils and the celebratory beers—preferably draught beers. Getting a keg for turkey day is a serious investment, but the Fizzics Waytap ($130) makes bottlesandcans full of the good stuff taste like its on tap. You put anything from a 12-ounce bottleto a tallboyin the machine, pull the handle, and let the Waytaps sonic waves work their foam-creating magic. An older version of the machine works with growlers, but it doesn’t look as pretty as the redesigned system.

13

LG 55-inch 4K HDR OLED B6

When it comes to taking a post-meal nap in front of something, only the best TV technology will do. Namely, OLED technology, with its category-defining black levels, unbeatable contrast, and slim panel design. There are higher-end OLED TVs in LGs lineup, but the 55-inch B6, which does 4K and HDR, just got a price cut to $2,000. That translates to the best picture quality ever offered at this price in the history of television. Seriously.

Credit: LG

When it comes to taking a post-meal nap in front of something, only the best TV technology will do. Namely, OLED technology, with its category-defining black levels, unbeatable contrast, and slim panel design. There are higher-end OLED TVs in LGs lineup, but the 55-inch B6, which does 4K and HDR, just got a price cut to $2,000. That translates to the best picture quality ever offered at this price in the history of television. Seriously.

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